Keep your friends close and your enemies closer: that’s the saying. Is it true, though? Well….in a really unexpected sense, it is.
There are lots of voices in our heads pretty much constantly; they help to decide everything, from what we’re having for breakfast all the way to whether or not we’re going to an event or a party or if we’re going to ask someone out.
Among all these voices, depending on our individual personalities, there will be one dominant one…and that voice is the Self Narrative: it’s the character and collection of stories you tell yourself that make you who YOU are. That all powerful, ‘louder than the crowd’ voice will be either a positive or a negative one. Depending on which voice is in control of your emotional and physical identity, you will either have a largely positive view of yourself (hey, it’s me: I’m great) or a largely negative view of yourself (people hate me: I’m SUCH a waste of space).
Now, a lot of people will argue that they have a healthy mixture of both voices in their heads…but, trust me, if they’re being honest – genuinely honest – one will be more dominant than the other. A good test to see if your positive or negative voice is in control is to watch for your arguments: if you have to state or mention who you are, how smart you are or what you have achieved in your life as a defense mechanism during an argument or conversation, then the negative voice is in control of you. If you never feel the need to do this, then the positive voice is usually running the show.
Another way to discover which voice commands the iron throne of your psyche is to look at your facebook. If it contains friends you don’t really like or one you strongly suspect don’t like you – and also if you have friend requests pending with people you KNOW aren’t going to accept them, then the negative is literally the ringmaster of your particular circus.
I speak as the owner of one of the most profoundly negative internal narritives I’ve ever encountered, so – as you will have no doubt identified by reading the above – my identification post is largely about identifying the negative. If you want my A-Z guide on identifying a positively dominated personality, don’t look on Facebook: there aren’t many of those personalities on there and the ones who are rarely if ever log in.
The poison of social media is the mirror which floats in front of your face and, using your own image, urges you to ‘Say Something.’ I think they call it a ‘Status Update’ but I could be wrong.
Davey Stone wrote ‘Why Do We Add People We Don’t Like on Facebook?’ during Lockdown 2021. If you enjoyed ‘Why Do We Add People We Don’t Like on Facebook?’ please consider subscribing to the blog. Like all the content here, it’s free.